Why bother?

Who.

If you’ve made it this far, congratulations.

Here are all the things you probably did want to know but would never actually ask because you assumed I’d go off on a tangent, reveal something medically graphic, emotionally chaotic or wildly unnecessary.

And you’d be right. I have a long and well‑documented history of telling people far more than they bargained for. If you want to know who the hell is writing this shit and why they would bother putting it on the internet, read on.

To make life easy, I have copied my online dating profile …

BORNGENDEROCCUPATION
1 January 1972 Pukekohe, New ZealandFemale (the old-fashioned kind)Creative Accountant
TRAVEL WISH LISTFAVOURITE ANIMALSCLAIM TO FAME
Galapagos Islands, Mauritius, Botswana, Japan, Saint LuciaGoats, Red Squirrels
Highly Commended – Pet Section – Goats (Mercury Bay Area School, 1978)
FAVOURITE QUOTETHINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR
“You are the result of billions of years of evolution. You will only live for a few years and will never exist again. Absolutely beautiful“. – Ricky GervaisToilet paper, cows, power steering, coffee, hugs, air conditioning and cheese.
BEST ATTRIBUTES
My smile, my sense of humour, my kindness. I’m also really good at laundry.
I am well mannered, generous, can hold my knife and fork correctly and don’t wear ugg boots in public.
Friends would describe me as kind, quirky and fun with a splash of reckless abandon.
Why.

In 2022, quite a few shit things happened (actually, quite a few shit things happened in the years before that, I’ll write about those another time) … there was a cancer diagnosis, then treatment (surgery, chemo, radiation). At the same time, my 5-year relationship fell apart. It was a very painful and lonely year. Summed up by Liz in her 1992 speech, it was “… not a year on which I shall look back with undiluted pleasure. In the words of one of my more sympathetic correspondents, it has turned out to be an ‘annus horribilis.

I am slowly recovering – though have come to the realisation I will never be the same person I was BC (Before Cancer). That’s a tough thing to reconcile because I quite liked the old me – warts and all. Sometimes I find it hard to remember the good stuff. When it all gets too much, I retreat into my burrow with my dog, a glass of champagne and write.
 
Writing my blog has been not only a way to practically share my shit ‘journey’ with faraway friends and family, it has also been cathartic (don’t underestimate the healing power of smashing your anger and sadness out on a keyboard). As I hammered away, there were times I found myself smiling – laughing even. In fact, if the only reason I write this blog is to make me – and possibly someone else – laugh, I think that is reason enough 🙂

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